Saturday, December 31, 2011

Happy New Year

Wow, I've really been negligent of my blog haven't I? Sorry about that. I'm having mixed feelings about the whole happy new year business. I'm thinking back on 2011 and trying to decide if you would consider it a good year, or a bad year. Certainly, it wasn't a horrid year. It's been a year in learning a few lessons. Like, appreciating your family while they are here. Taking each day as it comes. Being grateful for each day. Making the most of each day. And, when things seem bad, they can always be worse. To break it down, I'll give you some of the bad, and some of the good: In early spring my niece was diagnosed with inoperable, "incurable" brain cancer, and was given only a year to live. It was heartbreaking, and gut wrenching, and devastating, and any negative word you can think of. So, you might say, it was a bad year. But here's the good; she is still with us, and thanks to homeopathy, getting BETTER! It taught me to hug my children more, to take a deep breath and remember this when they are irritating me, and to love every moment I have with them. And that's definitely a good thing. It's been a rough year financially. That can be looked at as a bad year. I've had less kids in daycare, and unable to get more new babies easily, so making less money. My DH has been in and out of work due to school and other stuff for over three years now. That, plus the financial burden of school is tough. But my DH is also incredibly resourceful at times. He managed to get scholarships, loans, some employment, and even grants, which has all helped. And even though I cry sometimes with worry for our future, the fact is that right now, in the present, everyone is fed, clothed, and well-entertained. And by this time next year, my DH will be a fully-fledged graduate and hopefully employed full time! I'm not ready to let go of 2011 yet. Time sometimes feels like its rushing past me. My boys are growing too fast. I have some things to look forward to in 2012, like the birth of my next niece, and DH being done school. But I have things I'm not, like surgery on my cyst in Feb. Everytime I think of that my stomach turns over. I'm looking forward to being pain-free finally, but I'm TERRIFIED of going under anesthetic. And believe it or not I'm also NOT looking forward to DH finishing school. He enjoys school. He's happiest in school. When he's happy, I'm happier. He's around more too. When he's working, he's gone for almost twelve hours a day. It's nice when he's around for the boys, not just to say hello and goodnight. In 2011 we also travelled to Disney. As much as the old lady annoyed us, we will never forget that vacation and will forever be grateful for that. Those are memories that we will hang onto forever. I started 2011 with a broken wrist. So, not so great there, but it's fine now, so that's good? And I didn't do many dishes for about 8 weeks, which is definitely good. I guess I will just half to say that this year is one of those years that depends on whether you see the glass as half-empty or half-full. And I like to think that most of the time, I try to see the half-full point of view.