Well here I am bitching about the cottage again. So...if you don't want to hear it, don't read this post. Maybe some of you can sympathize, or empathize, I don't know.
You already know how I feel about the cottage and going there (see July ). Every year DH has to go up there and pull out the water line, drain the pump, pull up the dock as well as the useless boat ramp (for which we have no boat), among other chores. But those are the main things. The things that HE knows how to do, and really seems to be the only person that can do them. Really, all the other closing chores can and SHOULD be done by someone else. There ARE other family members!!
Which leads to my rant...Why the F*** is it ALWAYS up to him to do EVERYTHING??!! Last weekend, he went up on Sunday, leaving me, as usual to be a single mom. I'm used to that part. Not that I like it. He took his Dad with him, which I'm grateful for, because even if his dad is getting pretty useless as far as much physical labour is concerned, I'm glad he was there in case something were to happen. It's pretty isolated up there.
So he rented a wetsuit, which had to be back to the store by 3, and proceeded to pull the water line out, and do whatever else he did. When they arrived back home, I asked how things went, only to be told that he needs to go up again because he didn't finish everything!! WHAT!! Apparently, they didn't get the dock or boat ramp up, among other chores that weren't finished by Others-who-shall-remain-nameless. It made me so mad. I asked why he wasn't able to complete his main tasks, and he informed me it was because he was busy completely other things that should have already been done, but weren't. Which made me even angrier, of course. Now instead of being angry with Them, I was angry with him as well. I mean, why couldn't he have the common sense to finish his own tasks, and then leave whatever else he didn't have time for, for the Others?!!
My sister, N, has a theory about this. She thinks, and I tend to agree, that he thrives off it. That it doesn't annoy him, as it should, that They are taking away from his very limited family time by pushing all these demands onto him. That he isn't ready to let that go, for some reason. Maybe he just likes being up there, the quiet solitude, being on his own, despite having to do chores to do it. And, when I look at it that way, I can understand.
However, that also serves to make me angrier, because HOW DARE HE?? Do I get to spend a whole beautiful day away from my family? NO. Ever? NO. I don't even have a job that I get to escape the house and kids from. He does. Plus he has school now, which takes up even more of his time as he has assignments and studying to complete. And of course, I have to pick up the slack there.
I feel stretched. Not much more, and I'll snap, like an elastic band. I know this school thing is going to end at some point, and the ends justify the means, so to speak. It will be worth it in the end when he can get a better job and be happier doing it as well. So I will bide my time there.
But come on people, pray with me here, or whatever it is we non-religious folk do. Pray that that damn effing cottage BURNS TO THE GROUND this winter!! Please!
Have you ever thought of either you and the boys joining him to close the cottage, or having him take one or both boys (but you staying home for a breather)?
ReplyDeleteMy DH would've taken A and/or R with him, except that this weekend is pretty yucky weather-wise. Even still, at 5 and 3 years of age, they'd be quite time-demanding. But would your boys, or your eldest at least, have fun helping their dad?