Monday, November 29, 2010

Reflections and Revelations

As it seems to always be these weeks, it was a busy weekend again. On Friday afternoon my mom came up to visit for the first time in ages. It was a nice visit, not as forced or uncomfortable as it has been before. I think it may have something to do with the fact that she seems to have finally made some inner peace with what has happened in her life (meaning her and my dad's separation). She seemed a bit happier, which is so good. We talked about plans for Xmas and she asked my opinion on inviting my dad for Xmas dinner. That shocked the hell out of me, and was kind of funny too since my dad and I had only just been talking Xmas plans the evening before. We had thought aloud that the chances of him being welcomed there for Xmas dinner were slim to none. However, it seemed like a good idea to me, and my mom said she'd run it by my sister N.
This conversation then turned to gift giving, and we both agreed that last year's "no adult gifts" policy was a little miserable, albeit a money-saver. So we decided this year that all those who will be present at Xmas dinner Xmas day at Mom's would draw a name, and we'd put a $50 cap on the gift. At least this way we're not spending a ton of money we don't have, and you get something to bring home.
Later Friday evening, mom and I went to see HP7.1. Really good, but even though I knew it wasn't going to be the full story, it still surprised me when it came to an abrupt end.
Saturday was DH's birthday, but not much time for celebrating as R had a semi-final playoff ballhockey game, we had shopping to do and L had a birthday party of his own to go to. I let DH pick the takeout dinner, and of course he picked Chinese food, his favourite.
Sunday dawned bright and early with a final playoff game for R (they lost :( ) and L's hockey lesson. I didn't even get to see R's game because I had to take L. As it turned out, it was ok, I hate watching them lose anyway.
Later on, we had to go to the inlaws for DH's bday dinner. Before we left I called N to see if Mom had talked to her yet about Xmas. As it turned out she had and N was good to go. I was so glad, because I hate the thought of my dad not getting a Xmas dinner. So we talked a bit about the gift exchange and decided that to eliminate spouses drawing their own spouse's name, the guys would draw guys' names and vice versa. This led to the question, would my brother A be attending? So N called him to ask which turned out to be quite the ordeal. First, he freaked out thinking we'd changed our minds about no gifts, stating that he and his girlfriend weren't purchasing gifts this year. N told him about our plan, and asked if he would be there. His reply was that he would likely be spending Xmas with his girlfriend (which is understandable) and that they'd already made tentative plans to be at her parents' place. When N told him about my dad coming, he seemed upset, God knows why. N said he almost seemed like he wanted to say no they wouldn't be coming, but didn't for some reason. I don't know why he didn't just say he already had other plans, it was a perfectly viable excuse. He also apparently stated that he and I weren't getting along. Really? News to me seeing as how we haven't communicated at all since N's party for my BIL in July. You would think that alone would mean we weren't talking, but that's actually pretty normal for us, to go months between seeing or speaking. Granted, we did have an argument then, but as an adult, I didn't feel that was a reason to believe we weren't "getting along". Don't you have to be in communication with someone in order for you to be "not getting along" with them? Siblings have arguments all the time, we're no exception. Whatever the truth of the matter is, if he doesn't feel comfortable being there, then he shouldn't come. And if he feels that we aren't "getting along" then he obviously is upset with me for some unknown reason, in which case perhaps he should talk to me about it. I'm not really sure how he could be upset with me when we haven't even communicated for 5 months! Whatever.
So Sunday we were off to the inlaws for yet another delightful dinner. Actually, the meal itself was for once not bad although as usual, overcooked and late. We had hoped to eat around 5, so that we wouldn't have to rush right off after dinner (it's an hour drive home). But of course we didn't eat until 6:30, as my MIL is stubbornly adamant when it comes to her meat thermometer. And she won't turn up the damn oven either! GRRRRRRR...
DH got a sweater from his Nan, and a Home Depot gift card from his parents. I got a spa gift card that I'll probably never use for no spas that are anywhere around here. Sigh. Again, whatever. And yes, I got a gift. Because his mother forgot my birthday back in the beginning of October YET AGAIN (every damn year). But she'll never ever admit to forgetting it. She made up some lame-ass excuse about "being on her back" and "laid up" whatever the he'll that's supposed to mean. Same excuse every year, it's getting old. I guess she's trying to tell me she's been too sick?? Um, since October? Not to mention all the times I've seen/spoken to her since then, and not a word, not a birthday wish, nothing. Give it up lady and just admit it!! You forgot!! Again.
So that was a reflection on my weekend, with some revelations thrown in there.


  1. Sounds like a grr weekend to me. However, great news about your mom and a better Christmas.


  2. You could try selling the spa card on Craigslist or Kijiji. Treat yourself to something of YOUR choice with the money. No guilt - better, actually, since it would then be something you can use/enjoy :)

    Family is family. You can't choose them, other than your own spouse, LOL!

    Good news about Christmas Dinner though! Be prepared for some awkward moments, but they'll pass. It's the first of many which will (hopefully) incorporate both your parents!