I'm An Auntie Again!

Just a quick post to share my joy at being an aunt again. My niece, A., was born yesterday around 3 p.m. at 6lbs, 9oz. I'm so excited and happy for my sister and her husband! I also cannot wait to meet this new little person. Unfortunately, due to the fact that #1 - I live an hour's drive away from the hospital (that factor combined with the fact that I am not free to leave my house until all the "other" kids have gone home, around 5 pm) and #2 - yesterday after a winter that has been fairly mild by our standards, it decided to storm like a bugger, I have to wait now until the weekend to see her. Sigh. Oh well, it's not like I'm not used to it by now, after all, I did choose to live here (and I do love it) so I have to make sacrifices.

The pictures I posted aren't the best, I know, because they were sent to me from my dad's iPhone, but they're all I have, and they are definitely better quality than the ones I tried to steal from my other sister's Facebook page. And yeah, they're typical red-faced-scrunched-up-puffy-eyed newborn pictures, but she's still pretty cute! And if she's anything like her mommy was as a little kid, she's going to be completely adorable (and spoiled)!!

Sigh Of Relief Part 2

Ok, I had to just quickly post an update to my recent posting.

I confessed to DH tonight that I had been worried, and that my period was a couple of days late. I'm not sure how the conversation came up, but it did quite naturally for some reason during dinner. 'Course, we're trying to talk in code 'cause the kids are sitting right there, which is awkward, but the message was put across, something like this:

Me: "Well, I was actually a little concerned for a couple of days there; It was a bit late."

DH: staring blankly ahead with a funny sort of smile on his face.

Me: "What?"

DH: "Well, it wouldn't be the worst thing that could happen."

Me: WTF??

DH: "Course that would make that little trip to Peterborough a little bit more necessary, wouldn't it?" (To a clinic that does laser vasectomies, apparantly)

Me: still dumbfounded "Yeah, I guess so."

So, hmmmmmm.....

A Sigh Of Relief?

The past few days have been like a living, well, not hell really, but... well in turmoil. That I've bore alone. You see, I thought that maybe, just maybe, I might have been *deep breath*, PREGNANT!
Firstly, I should explain something. I'm on the Pill. My pills are a pack of 21. I've never felt it necessary to take the 7 sugar pills that make up a 28 pack, but perhaps after this weekend, I should reconsider. So with my pack of pills, they are all the same. Each pill has the same ingredient, so it doesn't matter where you start. You can start at the beginning, middle or end, wherever. They usually include a set of stickers you can paste on the top with the days of the week, to help you remember, but I often don't use that either. I rely on my oh-so-wonderful memory.
Now, often, for some reason, my period will start on the second-to-last or last day of my pill pack. I think it's because the dosage of hormones or whatever isn't quite strong enough for me, although the dr. has assured me it's still safe. I've become accustomed to just stopping taking the pill at that point. I figure, I'm already bleeding, what's the point in taking a pill to prevent pregnancy? It saves me pills in the end, and after a while, one or two or three pills can add up nicely to another pack! At that point, I just take seven days off and then start again the next "month".
With me so far? Ok.
So at the beginning of this past cycle we were on vacation in Ottawa. I did bring a new pack of pills to start taking, but..... I kind of forgot. Oops. So I ended up starting my new pack a couple of days late.
Fast forward to this past weekend. As far as I could remember, I could have SWORN, that the last cycle I had started on a Saturday, the Sat before we went away (because I remember my period ending while we were at the hotel). So I stopped my pill on Friday (just past). Now, usually, my body is already giving me signs of my period coming, you know, that lovely gross spotting you get to begin with. I usually start my period before my pills are even done, remember? So when I didn't get my period on Sat., I was starting to wonder.... However, for any normal person, you really wouldn't start bleeding that day, because the pill is still in your system. You have to give it at least 24 hrs or so.
So, I "prepared" myself Sat night, and woke up Sunday morning to....
NOTHING.
Gads.
At this point, I'm starting to imagine pregnancy symptoms. My mind is going, going, going and I'm thinking about it CONSTANTLY!! I was going to the bathroom I swear, at least every half hour to check (inspect with excrutiating attention to the TP). Still nothing. The worst part was, is that I had this terrible headache, probably due to the weather, and I didn't know if I should be taking anything. So I took acetaminophen, which took the edge off a bit.
All I could think about was what if??? Most of me rejected the idea. There are so many reasons why it wouldn't be a good idea.
#1. Really bad timing - DH is going back to college fulltime in the fall and he is probably not going to be working.
#2. Really bad timing - (I know, I said that already) I am taking on a new baby in the fall, as well as getting a toddler back fulltime, as well as a CRAZY INSANE schedule, so I really don't know how I would have handled being sick and tired as well as all that.
#3. I already gave away all our baby stuff, so we would have to somehow reaquire it.
#4. How was I going to tell DH? That was the part I was most scared of. I was so afraid that he would be mad, and think I did it on purpose, not to mention all the stress he's already under in regards to work, etc...
But a small part of me was rejoicing. I was already imagining names, how we would have to move the boys around (bedrooms I mean), and how wonderous and exciting it would be to see them as big brothers.
So last night, I bought a test, secretly, and hid it in my purse. My plan was that in the morning, when DH got up to shower, I would sneak downstairs and use the bathroom down there if nothing happened in the night. But something did happen in the night. Along with all the fun cramps as well. Ick.
So while I silently breathed a sigh of relief to myself in the bathroom this morning, a very small part of me was crying.

Sick, again.

The curse continues. I am sick, again! What is with this???

People are supposed to be healthier in the summer, not sicker!

L is FINALLY fever free, after 7 looooooonnnngggg days and two visits to the clinic. Who knows what it was, all I care is that it's gone now. But I somehow think that maybe he was fighting two viruses at once. The one that caused flu-like symptoms, that I caught last week, and then this cold. Fortunately for him, other than the fever, the cold hasn't been too bad for him, unlike me.
I feel like death warmed over today. I am just thankful that it is not a beautiful sunny day; it is miserable and rainy today. So I don't feel guilty about not taking the kids outside to play.

On a completely different note, I got to see my nephew yesterday. He is, of course, gorgeous!! I was sad that this cold kept me from getting too close to him, or my sister, but you must do what you must do. I would feel terrible if he got sick and was only a few days old.

My niece, M (she'll be 3 in Aug) was already starting to feel the effects of jealousy. She is very used to being the cute one, the centre of attention from all, the Princess. This is going to be very hard on her, and hard on my sister as well. You see, she is the youngest cousin (well, was) and so was doted on by all her aunties as well as Grandmas and Grandpas. Plus, my sister, who is a teacher, would take her to school with her in the mornings (where she would get picked up by her babysitter) and was loved and adored by all manner of staff and student.

Wow.

What a kick in the teeth for her. Within a half hour of my sister arriving home from the hospital, she had already had a tantrum about not getting enough cookies. My poor sister, N, is in for a rough ride. Lucky my mom lives around the corner from her to relieve her.

I was lucky that way. We didn't have too many issues like that, as R was already more than used to sharing his mother's affections with many other children. I think that must have helped a lot.

On a sadder note, my poor dad is probably NEVER going to get to meet this baby. N has some kind of irrational hate for him, stemming from when my parents split up last October. At first, she was angry with him for "doing this to Mom and our family", which I could understand, but didn't really share. Then it went on from there. I just don't understand why she hates him so much, and what is it that he's supposedly done to make her deny him access to her house, her life and her family.

I don't talk with her about it, as I'm afraid that it would cause an argument between the two of us, and if you knew me, you would know that I am such a WIMP when if comes to confrontation.

But I feel so bad for my dad. He really hasn't done anything to deserve this kind of ostricization (is that a word?) and it's just sooooo unfair that he doesn't get to meet and hold his newest grandchild.

The weird thing is, is that my mom and dad are quite civil with each other. Yes, my mom hates what he did, but she is accepting it now, and probably doesn't see the point in being a hateful nasty person towards him for the rest of their lives.

Oh, I could go on and on, as one subject leads to another, but I think this post is probably long enough, and rambling enough too!

Happy Canada Day!!

Happy Canada Day everyone!! Especially my Canadian friends!

Ok, I know I'm a day early, but I don't think I'll have time to post tomorrow, so just pretend this is tomorrow, k?

You see, my sister had her baby boy last night, so tomorrow I'll be travelling to her neck of the woods to see the family and meet my new nephew!! I'm so excited to be an aunt for the second time! I remember when my niece, M, was born I was completely taken by surprise at how much I instantly loved her. I know, it shouldn't be surprising to love a child, but I didn't think someone else's child could come close to the love I feel for my own children, even someone as close to me as my sister.

But I loved (and still do, of course) M instantly, and profoundly, and that made it even harder to be over an hour's drive from my sister.

So I am looking forward to meeting this little guy, and experiencing that love once again. Isn't it amazing how love grows and grows?